Saturday, March 9, 2013

On The Battlefield This Past Week....


    Press play to the above link and let the music flow as you continue to read.  This is only semi-related in the fact that this song is absolutely amazing and makes my ears tickle with an erotic style.

    Ok, now onto business.

    I spent a lot of time thinking about what tonight's column would be about and I decided that it would be based on a personal story of the last few days as I will explain how my blatant sarcasm gets me into a lot of trouble, yet I always win my point it seems so...yeah.  Ha!

    So this past week I have been arguing with people all week.  I almost got into my first official cat-fight, I told off a fairweather friend who is a complete dink half the time and my ex thoroughly pissed me off.  I'd like to blame my bitchy demeanor on PMS, but that is just the puss out excuse for everything.  Nope, I fess up that I have been a total bitch this entire week and it is because people have been pushing my buttons and I finally had enough!

Yes, when I am mad I look exactly like this...

     My week started off getting into a Facebook bitch fight.  Facebook always has drama on it, but this was absolutely ridiculous.  Now, I'm not going to stoop to the other party's level and completely humiliate them on the internet, however this was the dumbest Facebook fight I have ever gotten into.  With someone twice my age almost.  Yeah.  Just a parent who seems to have the emotional and psychological maturity of an eight year old.  Honestly, fighting with someone on a social networking site who is twice your age is completely ridiculous because at that point you feel like you are having a cyber fight with someone who should be hanging out with your parents, not playing around on Facebook.
    Furthermore (random side note), I remember when you had to be part of a school or company to have a Facebook.  Now they give them out to everybody.  Including crazy people.  Smart decision there, Mark.

Here is the type of Facebook fights that
always make for a great read though!

    I also further learned this week, that aside from Facebook wars still being as pointless as they have always been, I learned that it is extremely hard to be friends with an ex.  I always figured I could master being friends with an ex, until I started getting involved with someone else.  This is going to quickly turn into my philosophy on relationships and ex- relationships so just bare with me.

   Okay, staying friends with an ex who was at one point and time the absolute love of your life is a bad idea. Very, very bad idea.  I have an ex who I have a great friendship with, UNTIL new partners come into the picture.  That's when things get testy.  
    You start getting interested in someone new because you have been dumped by the same ex four or five times because you were stupid enough to go back repeatedly.  We couldn't make us work as a relationship because of jealousy and stuff so yeah let's try being friends.  Because that will make a whole shit ton of sense in the end... For awhile it worked well. Now, I have reached the point where I have no issue should that particular ex start dating.  I didn't think they had an issue either, but OH SHIT was I wrong....
     Take a half pint of jealousy mixed with a shit ton of manipulative guilt trip and you get the life cocktail I got served the other night.  
Thanks, Obama!

    The third fight was blip of stupid.  Just a typical disagreement among people who don't have the best relationship as it is as far as friends go.  Me defending a friend of mine and the other person getting defensive.  No biggie.

     Oh and I almost forgot.  Here is where I become a bit of a uber bitch just because this pissed me off, severely.  This guy, who asked me out on a date a long time ago apparently is holding a grudge that I will not do him because it was brought to my attention that he thinks all these less then spectacular things about me. 
      Here's where shit gets real, Homeboy.  When you have a face that looks like a 70's porn star's hair pie vagina, of course I'm not even going to consider sleeping with you! It's called a razor, Grizzly Adams. 
Seriously, who would want to swap spit
with a bushy forrest of trapped food and chew.

     So that was my week in fighting.  I feel as though I came out on top.  Yeah.  So now you have heard my new favorite Dubstep artist Bassnectar (provided you followed my directions and listened to the epic stuff video link above).  So, thanks for reading my usual followers.  

     Closing thought: People suck.  Just punch them.

  xoxo ;)

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